One of the remarkable things about you is how much I am drawn to being present when I am with you. I attribute that to your total acceptance: you offer a place for me to be myself — more than that, you encourage and rejoice in it. This is so rare a quality in this world that I joyfully respond to it.
I am present when I respond and react to what is actually happening, rather than using what the past has taught me, or reacting in order to bring about some future outcome. I don’t claim to be anywhere near perfection in this; presence is a matter of the degree to which we are focused on the events in front of us. Neither do I claim that being present is always the most desirable state. Sometimes the future needs attention, too, so we try to control the world in order to make our imagined future come to pass. There are times when that is appropriate, but often it’s like always ordering the next meal while you’re eating the current one.
Being present is an important part of non-interference. By being present, the world just is, so I can let you be who you are, which in turn gives you the opportunity to be present. It’s a virtuous circle, and having experienced it, why would either of us ever want it to be any other way? That is why I was so sure early on, even though I could not articulate the reason, that not only hadn’t we argued, but that we probably never would.
There is another aspect of being present that we have both remarked on, which is the experience of newness that it brings. Nothing is ever the same, and it is very mysterious and counter-intuitive. You would think that settling in for a movie or walking around the park would become drab through familiarity. They don’t. I surmise that they are intrinsically different – there is no Groundhog Day. The walk I am taking on Thursday is never confused with the walk I took on Tuesday.
Another way to put this is that we are not constrained by our past, which gives us an extraordinary sense of potential, change and growth. By being open to what is present, we are open to change. It is not suppressed in favor of what has been, nor rejected in fear of what might happen. The result is a sense that we always have more to do and more to explore.
P.S. In writing this, I really enjoyed some of our earlier posts on the subject:
- Union…Principles…Guidelines on 3/19
- The Path to Peace on 1/21
- Why do Things Always Change? on 6/11
- Being Present In The Moment is Celebrating It All! on 6/12
- Presence and Union on 6/15
- Spontaneity and No Rules on 7/14
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