Dear Kat,
One way to describe how we relate to each other is as adults.
This requires some back story to explain. As children we need to be taught many things. While that ideally teaches us to relate to others as equals, it must partly forgo that style, or children would have equal say on whether to go to the dentist. Because the examples set for us include both equality and parent-child, we take both styles of relating into our adult-hood. Our task as adults is to divest ourselves of the adult-child style as much as possible. There are two cases where this is inappropriate: with children of our own, and with others who have not been fully socialized.
This is all somewhat theoretical, but I have come to this after much thinking about you and I, and what is different. It brings to mind “Games People Play” by Eric Berne, though I didn’t see that until late in my musings. If we looked at others’ conflicts as involving an adult or child component, I think we would find a good fit.
Kit
Digg this
Recent Comments